Early this morning I lost my Sammie. It was a terrible, tragic death. I watched him decline so rapidly over the course of four days. It was painful for me, but I can only imagine how painful it was for him.
I adopted Sammie from AZ Piggie Poo Rescue on January 30, 2015, exactly a week after I lost my piggie Kirby. It was fate that Sammie and I would end up together. When I researched small animal rescues, I came across AZ Piggie Poo Rescue in North Phoenix. A week after Kirby passed, I made the hour drive to the rescue so I could donate Kirby’s leftover food and hay. That day I was introduced to Sammie and I fell in love. The way he stared at me when I held him for the first time was undeniable. I took him home the next day.
Gosh, Sammie was something else. His personality was just so much fun. He was so full of life and positive energy. Sam loved running around with the dogs and cats. He also loved every vegetable on the planet. Sam was a bigger than average guinea pig, so I had to give him plenty of veggies!
Sammie had a 4×2 area to sleep and eat in, and everyday I took him out to run around the office with the other animals. I’d have him out for hours at a time. Since I work from home, I was always right beside my Sam.
I came home from Nashville, TN on Sunday afternoon. Immediately when I got home I greeted Sammie with some fresh veggies – spinach being his favorite. He enjoyed them and everything seemed fine. Matt had been cleaning his area and taking him out to play while I was gone. On Monday I noticed his breathing was abnormal. I figured maybe it was just a little bug and he wasn’t feeling well. By Tuesday his breathing became more rapid so I took him to see Dr. Funk, an exotic pet veterinarian at VCA Mesa Animal Hospital. Dr. Funk is amazing. He took care of Kirby for over 6 years so of course I knew Sam was in good hands with him.
Dr. Funk said that Sammie looked and sounded perfectly healthy on Tuesday, although his heart rate was about 220 beats per minute, which is almost 100 over the norm. We thought that maybe it was the onset of an upper respiratory infection, so Dr. Funk put Sam on Baytril in an attempt to fight it early.
By Wednesday, Sammie was extremely lethargic. He wasn’t really moving at all. He just slept and occasionally ate some hay and drank some water. I started getting really nervous. I knew that URIs could be fatal for piggies. He let me hand feed him some hay and he was still drinking water.
On Thursday Sammie stopped eating and drinking completely. He wouldn’t even lay down now. It looked like he couldn’t get comfortable and he was in pain. Instead of his breathing being rapid, it was apparent that he was struggling to breathe. I took him back to the vet right away.
When Dr. Funk picked up Sammie to listen to his heart, Sam was obviously in pain. I opted to have X-rays done. I needed answers. Was it a tumor? Enlarged heart?
Well, Dr. Funk showed me the X-ray results immediately. He showed me that we couldn’t even see Sammie’s heart on the X-ray because his chest and lungs were so filled with fluid from some sort of infection. This explains why he couldn’t get comfortable – it was probably so painful to lay on that fluid and it also made it hard for him to breathe. Dr. Funk explained my options and was totally honest with me. The medication probably wouldn’t help and he most likely didn’t have much longer on this earth.
I took Sam home and continued to syringe feed him critical care food, water and his antibiotics. I literally sat next to him all day. Every now and then he’d go to his water bottle and look at it, put his head up like he was going to drink, but couldn’t. It’s like it hurt too badly. By the evening, I could hear every breath that Sam took. He just stared at me, almost to say that he was hurting.
I’ve never felt so much heartbreak. I watched Sam deteriorate so quickly but I was with him every minute. I kept syringe feeding him food and water. I also rearranged his area and put a lot of padding and blankets down so he could try and get comfortable. I even put a vaporizer right next to the cage and that’s where he spent most of his time. He would sit right by the hot steam. I put some drops of eucalyptus oil in it so it’d be easier for him to breathe. I know it helped because he sat there a majority of the time.
I spent my entire day talking to Sam, getting nose to nose with him and telling him how much I loved him. When I would hold him in a blanket to feed him, I would kiss and pet him, reminding him of how much he meant to me. I asked him to forgive me if there was anything else I could have done. I apologized for any suffering or pain he was going through.
I tossed and turned for a few hours last night then woke up to feed Sam around 2am. He seemed alert because I walked in the room and said his name and he turned to look at me. He did let me give him some food and water. I still had an ounce of hope that a miracle would save him. I sat by his side until 3am.
When I went back to bed, I just kept praying. I was telling God to please help us through. I didn’t want Sam to suffer. I didn’t want him to be in pain. I also didn’t want to have to make the choice on whether or not to euthanize him because I wanted to give him a chance to recover.
“Please God. I don’t want Sammie to suffer anymore. Please help him.”
When I woke up at 7am to feed Sammie again, I walked into the room and saw him laying down in front of his igloo. There was a brief second where I thought “Oh my God, he’s laying down and sleeping!!” Then I really came to, and knew he was gone. I put my hand on him to check for a heart beat but there was nothing. He really was gone. God helped him – he took his pain away.
I woke Matt up and I just cried. We prayed by him and said our final goodbyes. I wrapped him in a blanket in preparation to take him to the vet for cremation.
At 8am sharp, we drove to the vet to drop Sammie off. By then I had already called and made arrangements. I chose to get him a private cremation so I can get his ashes back, just as I did with Kirby.
I feel guilty. Is there something I could have done to prevent this infection? Was it a bad vegetable? Was it something in the air? I cleaned his area every single day and my house is always clean. I take so many preventative measures to make sure my animals stay healthy. But it didn’t work this time.
Kirby passed in my arms in January. He was old – 6 years, 4 months. I rescued him when he was 4 months old and we had a wonderful life together. Kirby’s passing was very quick and painless. It was his time to go. But with Sammie, it was so incredibly painful. He was only 2.5 years old and I just wonder how long the fluid was building up or when he got that infection. I wish I could think about all of the fun we had together but all I can focus on right now is how sad and horrible he looked in his last 24 hours with me.
I’m so sorry Sam. I did everything I could. I tried. I’m so sorry.
Rest in peace, my son. I hope you have fun with Kirby. I’ll see you again one day.
In memory of Sammie: January 2013 – June 5, 2015
In memory of Kirby: October 1, 2009 – January 23, 2015
I’m so sorry for your loss. I have tears running down my eyes right now. I know how how hard it is to see our fur babies in pain. I recently lost my dwarf rabbit Bun-Bun. She was way too young too, just 2 years old and they usually live to about 10. She was fine when I went to bed but had passed suddenly sometime in the night. I guess that was easier than knowing they are in pain though.
Thank you Cathy. It’s so awful when they pass so young. I’m glad I invested in the X-rays so I knew exactly what was going on and I don’t have any unanswered questions as to why he died. It was so incredibly painful to sit next to him and watch him struggle to breathe. I’m relieved that God took him naturally and I hope I made him as comfortable as I possibly could.
I am heartbroken for you. You went above and beyond and did absolutely everything you could. You are a wonderful pet parent. My thoughts are with you as you grieve.
I’m really glad that he was in my care and not someone else’s. Most people wouldn’t have even taken him to the vet, let alone syringe feed him. I did the best I could 🙁
I am so sorry about Sammie. He was so cute. <3
While I can't say I know exactly what you are going through, I lost my chinchilla about 5 years ago and I was heartbroken. I still have days where it's really hard.
~hugs~
Thanks Lauren. I’m always going to have moments and days where I think about the animals who I’ve lost. This is the worst part of being such a dedicated pet parent.
Especially after the loss of Kirby so recently, I can’t even imagine the sadness you must feel. But I know that Sammie was happy and loved by you, and that’s what he deserved. I’m glad you found one another, and I know you’ll see him again some day.
Honestly, I never would have thought this would happen, especially 4 months after Kirby’s passing. I thought for sure Sammie would live to be 6 just like Kirby. I won’t go out and rescue another guinea pig right away now. Sam’s loss was just too painful and horrendous. I’m so traumatized and I can’t bare the thought of going through it again in a short time period. I lost 2 pigs in 5 months. I’m hurting.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This has been hard to read and I really feel your pain. It doesn’t matter what kind of pet it is, it’s always so difficult to see them go. I understand about your questioning if you did all you could. I felt that way when my German Shepherd died last year. But I’m sure you were the best that you could be. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Hang in there. Peace.
I’m the type of person who treats all my animals equally. People think that guinea pigs are just rodent, when in fact they are much more intelligent than people realize. They are high maintenance if you take care of them properly. I have to work through these feelings of guilt but I know it will take some time.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is hard when little ones go so quickly. Our prayers are with you. Love, LadyBird and Sabina
Thank you so much. This experience has been unbearable.
Oh, Amanda. I’m so sorry. This post made my heart break for you. Just know that you truly did all you could – you are an AMAZING mama to your pets, and Sammie was lucky to have you. You rescuing him was probably the best thing to have ever happened to him, and it was very clear how loved he was. My thoughts are with you and the rest of your fur-babies.
Thank you Chelsea. I’m so torn between “I did everything I could” and “what could I have done better.” Hopefully with time I will be able to process the situation better. Right now I’m just too sad.
Oh, I’m crying, this is so sad. I’m so sorry for your loss of Sammie, he has to be the most adorable piggy I’ve ever seen. He was so lucky to have you as a Mom, you rescued him and gave him the best life. I can see that from the photos and your words. I’m amazed at how he was friends w/ both your cat and your dog – what a great thing for Sammie! He had a wonderful, loving home with you. You did everything you could to give him the best life ever & he knew that. Sending thoughts & prayers your way to ease your pain.
Love & Biscuits,
Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them
Thank you Cathy. It’s been such a traumatic experience. I’m slowly coming around to realize that I did indeed do everything I could. I hope over time I can just remember the great memories I had with him. He was truly a gift from God 🙂
Amanda, I am so very sorry for all the pain you are feeling and for the loss of Sammie. 🙁 He was adorable and obviously very special. Please don’t feel guilty, it’s obvious how much you loved him and that you did every single thing you could to help him. Sometimes they just leave us way too early. 🙁 In time those recent mental images you have of him being sick will eventually fade and you’ll be able to remember all the good memories and know that you did everything in your power to give him a wonderful life full of love. Saying prayers for you and all your fur kids.
Thank you so much Camille. I keep trying to look at pictures of him when he was healthy and enjoying life, although that’s hard too since I wish he was here. They say time heals all wounds, but I’m still grieving the cat I lost 2 years ago. When it comes to my animals, they are my biggest struggle for so many reason LOL!
I’m so sorry about Sammie; you are such a great pet parent and gave him such a wonderful life. It’s so hard after a loss, especially when you find yourself going back over everything and wondering “what if;” but take comfort in knowing you were awesome to Sammie and you did everything you could. A lot of us have those same doubts after a loss. Sending thoughts & prayers your way.
I keep reminding myself “You took him to the vet twice. You got him X-rays. You syringe fed him for 2 days. Most people wouldn’t have done those things, especially for a guinea pig.” But still, that’s not making it any easier right now. I’m still just sad. I haven’t slept well since he got really sick.
I’m so very, VERY sorry to hear this. At my house, we’re still sad about losing Nissy so I kind of know how you feel. It WILL get better although, might take a very long time. May I offer a little advice? Try your best to think of the times that were filled with love and fun, as much as possible. Eventually, the feelings of sadness will grow farther and farther apart, although probably never completely. That’s what we’re doing to get through this time. It helps. I hope it can help you, too.
Purrs,
Seville.
I’ve been trying my best to think of the happy times. I look at pictures of him when he was being silly and running around with my other animals. He was so playful and fun. Time heals all wounds…but we’ll see. I still mourn the loss of my cat 2 years ago. Thank you Seville!
So sorry for you loss.. <3
I am so very sorry for your loss. It is terrible to lose a family member. Praying for your peace and strength during this difficult time. It’s not about “moving on” but learning to live differently. Sammie will ALWAYS be with you! Sending love and hugs.
You’re absolutely right. It’s been quite an adjustment already. My routine has changed…and so has Wynston’s. One day at a time!
No words can make the loss of one of our pets easier. It is tragic and painful. I’m so sorry you lost Sammie. Let me know if there is anything I can do…
Thank you! I’m hanging in there 🙂 Have to keep my head up for my other animals!